Women in Pakistan (Real Story with Documentary Evidence)

Malala - a threat to our moderate and tolerant society

Malala – a threat to our moderate and tolerant society (Duh!)

WARNING: This post contains graphic content that can disturb some people. Reader discretion advised.

Disclaimer : This post is work of satire and is intended for mature audience only, it is strictly prohibited for the people with westophobia, having high degrees of patriotosterone. 

Many people, particularly from the West,  keep inquiring about the status of women in Pakistan and its sister society – Afghanistan. However, I have found that NGOs, civil society activists, liberal fascists and journalists from here misguide Westerners about the status of our women.

They portray a dreadful scenario and grim state of affairs running with women here, complaining most of the time about low status of women. There are many people who forget about the achievements of our women. They picture women as secondary citizens in Pakistan and Afghanistan. After observing the situation, I couldn’t help but draw a comparison between the West and the East concerning women’s question. (Of course, I was never asked to draw such comparison, but I used my selfrighteousness.)

Here is my account of the facts:

Pakistan is a far more moderate, superior, luxurious, safe, heavenly society for women than US and other Western societies. Women here enjoy a range of freedoms and rights which women in west can only imagine. No women ever, in history of US became president of that country, but here in Pakistan, Benazir Bhutto became prime minister for two terms. (Though, she was not allowed to complete both of her terms and was dethroned only on account of being a woman and ZAB’s daughter; later forced to live in exile; returned; and later the lady was murdered in cold blood by saviors of our moderate civilization.  But we are not going to discuss it. and why? you Kaafirs, don’t be naughty 😀 ) But, before she ran for prime minister’s candidature, was forced to marry a person by Mullahs because a virgin woman prime minister was more dangerous than those terrorists.

A virgin Benazir was a threat to our moderate society, thus married.

A virgin Benazir was a threat to our moderate society, thus married.

Besides being prime ministers and so, women in Pakistan compete men in many fields. Today, they can fly jet engines and civil air crafts. They are no way back than their western sisters.

A Pakistan woman pilot. This clearly depicts how far we have progressed in women empowerment.

A Pakistani woman pilot. This clearly depicts how far we have progressed in women empowerment.

They are free to speak whatever they like, but…

Freedom of speech for women in Pakistan

Freedom of speech for women in Pakistan

Not only this, but women in Pakistan are serving as professional warriors, on ranks of Majors and Lieutenants providing better security to our modernity.

A woman major patrolling our ideological boundries

A woman Major patrolling our ideological boundaries.

Our women enjoy more economic freedom than any other western country. They are economically self-sufficient and feed themselves well. There is no restriction by our law which protects women’s economic rights.

A self-sufficient woman enjoying economic freedom in Pakistan.

A self-sufficient woman enjoying economic freedom in the cloud-cuckoo-land.

Our ‘modern’ and ‘moderate’ society has championed in the rights of women and upgraded their status. Women, if sick, can choose their doctors and shamans at their own will. It is totally up to them who will they choose for treatment of injuries after being beaten at home or in public.

Medical Rights: A women is being treating by a doctor after an acid attack on her face.

Medical Rights: A women is being treated by a doctor after an acid attack on her face.

A woman before and after an acid attack: She is free to choose her doctor, but not husband.

A woman before and after an acid attack in Pakistan: They are free to choose their doctors, but not husbands.

But if they choose alternate methods of treatment, they are free to visit any Aamil, Baba or Pir sahb.

An Aamil Baba treating a woman's illness - alternate methods of treatment

An Aamil Baba treating a woman’s illness by calling djins – alternate methods of treatment

Besides all these freedoms, women are also required to be faithful to our social order. Failing to do so may result in honor killings, public flogging and whipping. These checks maintain the social order of our society and keep it warm, vibrated, moderate and healthy. We hate argumentative women, school going girls and Witchy bitchy anti-polio workers. An example to cite – Malala Yousufzai.

Karo-Kari (Honor Killing): hundreds of unfaithful, morally downgraded women are killed to protect our moderate society.

Karo-Kari (Honor Killing): hundreds of unfaithful, morally downgraded women are killed to protect our moderate society.

Our sense of justice: A teenage girl is killed for maintaining honor of family. This is our highly successful method to protect our civilization from collapse.

Our sense of justice: A teenage girl is killed for saving the honor of family. This is our highly successful method to protect our civilization from collapse.

Of course, you can not even think of such sense of justice in western societies. Our moral order and moderate society works day and night to keep itself running by providing equal justice to its citizens. Women are equal to men, yes! but men are sometimes more equal to women.

Public flogging: A scene of moderate and just society.

Public flogging: A day to day scene of moderate and just society.

Women are also free to eat Samosas, Pakoras, Halal Pizzas, all kinds of Halaal foods including Halal Bubble Gum; they can drink all kinds of colas, and that too in public (But only under Hijab.) They can watch Madani TV Channel and of course, Maya Khan’s morning show with her tips on how to convert infidels to Islam.

Eating Pizza under Burqa. Yummy

Eating Halal Pizza under Burqa. Yummy

Drinking Cola under Burqa. Burrrrrrrp!

Drinking Cola under Burqa. Burrrrrrrp!

Yahoooooooooo! What more freedom and rights do you want, infidels!

Yahoooooooooo! What more freedom and rights do you want, liberal fascist!?

Romance With/Under Burqa. What can we say further?

Romance With/Under Burqa. What can we say further?

Ladies and gentlemen, after presenting before you this much data with documentary evidence, we are here striking one last blow to western society and unveil its hypocrisy. You folks know it very well that there has never been a woman president in entire history of US, and since it is our selected benchmark for measuring women empowerment in any society; we have got a trouble here. West has an example of Chancellor Angela Merkel of Germany.

Chancellor Angela Merkel

Chancellor Angela Merkel

But here is the treasure for you:

Recent TV shows by televangelist Dr. Aamir Liaqat and star anchor Ansar Abbasi have revealed the reality of Mrs. Markel. Markel, in reality, is a man. Hohoooooooooooooooo!  Yes Friends! and here is the documentary evidence shown in TV shows of the both:

Reality of Angela Merkel: She is He - a man. see her private photo. Western hypocrisy revealed.

Reality of Angela Merkel: She is He – a man. May be a she-man. Wait,no! May be shemale. No, forget it. But wait, see her private photo. Western hypocrisy revealed.

By now, you are probably well convinced about West’s hypocrisy. They are not tolerant and moderate societies. We are! And whatever propagandist literature they publish and distribute about our intolerance towards women, does not contain an iota of the truth. In fact, it is nothing but conspiracy of Jews and the Zionist lobbies and Indian Banyaas and Angela Markel and of course never forget – Justin Bieber.

Note: This post is inspired by a discussion between my friend Emily Hauze and her friends from Pakistan. See Actual Post by Emily Hauze.

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4 Responses

  1. Bold and powerful. Also made me laugh almost as hard as the street sign advertising a “free cock with each biryani.” Bravo Zaffy. Well done.

    • Thanks Emily. Love that your way of encouraging me on occasions 🙂

  2. […] Women in Pakistan (Real Story with Documentary Evidence). […]

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